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Thursday, October 16, 2014

10/16 - thoughts from a rest stop

How about something quick and random...

This morning, my day started w random errand and then a funeral.
At the funeral, I sat in the back, alone.  I do so to control my emotions, not that I'll start sobbing uncontrollably or anything, but i also don't want eye contact to effect me.  This was actually the first full service and burial I've attended in almost exactly 20 years, the last was for my grandmother.
As I sat in the back, I didn't focus on the pastor.  I watched the family, my family.  His friends.

He was always a funny guy when I was a kid, always trying to stump us (the kids) with some clever riddles or trick questions.  I think he's one of the guys I got some of my sarcasm and humor from, along with my dad and other uncles.  I remember always enjoying time with the family, listening to the jokes they'd all tell or how they'd BS around a game, during a holiday function.   I remember looking up to a lot of them and how they'd talk, how they had their professions, (or maybe I imagined some of it... I was 10 or 12 when we stopped seeing everyone).  They had good, hard working jobs and a few served for the armed services.

Today, as I watched men fold the american flag over his casket, it hit me... We're very quickly losing a special generation that will never be duplicated  and with their death, dies class, work ethic and pride.
I felt this when Joe Paterno died.  I see their generation as a great men who worked hard, who stood for something, who worked for their families, who were noble and loyal.  Manners mattered.  How their kids behaved, mattered. Language mattered.  How they dressed, mattered.  I see this generation out for dinner and they wear shirts and ties.  I see them out in stores or running errands, and they are so, so out of place.

Technology and this society has rocketed off to another level that is accelerating faster and faster and more dangerous than ever.
We live in a world of instant gratification, where every answer to any question is at my finger tips.  I don't have to work for the answers.. I can Google it and its handed right to me.  I don't have to learn roads or highways, its right here on my phone.   We want 3 week diet plans and to be happy RIGHT NOW, so we pop pills to "fix it."

When I was younger, I found humor in Pete Townsend's line "I hope I die before I get old."  It was true then but I found it be a smart ass line against those older.  I thought "I don't want to turn into an old stuffy, dick, looking down and guys like me."  But now its true for another reason... I'm not enjoying the scenery here and there's nothing I can do and I don't see a light at the end of this.  I see technology and our government (the president is irrelevant) continuing to evolve into this carnivorous animal, consuming everything in its way.  Like a steam roller with shark teeth tearing apart anything that was "so yesterday."

I hate when people say "old school," as some sort of slight.  We need more old school.
(I think I live in the right community to hang onto some of this... we'll find out)

--------------------

Right now, I'm sitting in a rest stop on the way to Detroit to see Pearl Jam.  When people asked where I was going, I should've said "headed to a self improvement seminar."  A) It would've been accurate, B) I wouldn't have heard any shit for going alone.
If you know me, you've already had the thought "Um a funeral and pearl jam in the same day?  That's dangerous."
This is the 12 city I've seen them and I tried to figure how many times but it's over 20 so... enough to not bother trying.

Every so often, we need moments that reset the brain a bit and give us some perspective.  I've often  found them in life milestones like the birth of my girls, deaths, and other events.  Days that make you step back and pay attention to who's who and where they stand.  Who you are, where you're going, what type of impact you're making.
I told a friend yesterday, I feel bad for people that think recreating a card board box is such a big deal to treat other people poorly, "My box is better you scum bag!" type shit.  
It makes me feel very alien.

I feel we need these resetting moments, these life challenges, these milestones to force us to look in the mirror and wonder, to look at our lives and wonder, to look at who we are and what are goals are.  How many people do you help?  How many people do you make happy?  And then never mind the quantity... hows the quality?  Maybe you have 2 awesome friends... be awesome back, who gives a F that theres only 2 and someone else has 12?
Be great
Be useful
Get the bullshit out of your head, that shit that you keep repeating, the anchor that slows your ass down.  Drop that shit and fly.

(Cont from row 20, seat 27, waiting for the band)
I parked and a guy jumped out of a car next to me, "hey bud, can we drink here?"  I look around and say "um, no cops." So he hands over a beer and three friends hop out of his car, 2 girls and another guy.
"You come alone?" They ask.
Yup.
Haha from where?  
Cleveland
You must like these guys...
Oh, A little bit