(Break. Writing this free… no format or filter… sitting in an airport w 90 minutes… had a thing on my mind to shed, so I needed music to help black out the noise of the airport. The irony of Release being song #1 on my shuffle isn’t ironic at all. Iykyk).
Back to kids…
I believe it was between 3-6, maybe 7, the beta brain waves are developing and it’s all about mirroring and copying what they see.
The phase after that, maybe the following, I don’t remember the name, but it was external processing regarding what we hear. People speak “truths,” to us and it becomes, usually becomes, a strong part of our identities.
What did you see?
What did you hear?
You may not remember, but it’s in you like the circles of grain deep inside the old tree.
A habit.
The Score Revealed
I’ve “killed myself,” many times over. A version I was, wasn’t “________ enough,” so i had to go. Recreate and come back something new and better.
Over and over and over.
Good enough?
Good looking enough?
Smart enough?
Strong enough?
What’s controllable?
What’s adjustable?
How can you even prove it? Even to yourself. Confidence comes and goes, eventually you’re sitting there searching for proof and it’s not there. So you take inventory of your “tool kit,” and analyze.
What can I do?
What can I upgrade within myself, on myself?
And no one can know…. Because if they figure out you’re not ______ enough, they’ll remove you. Fired. Dumped. Insulted. Dismissed. Replaced by someone or something that is already _______ enough. So you leave before they know and try to save some pride by walking away on your terms.
But did you really have to walk?
This mindset might sound aggressive. Maybe it seems like a guy who gets shit done and evolves and grows and pushes the ball fwd everyday.
Or maybe it sounds like a guy desperate, grasping and running on fumes to constantly be useful, to be needed, for someone or something to finally have proof of being ______ enough.
The irony is both.
It’s sucks. It’s hard. It’s mostly sad w a few blips of success that last just long enough to realize the moment is over and now you have to chase another “win,” somehow, somewhere.
What did you see that created you?
What did you hear that created you?
Keep going.
Keep working hard.
Don’t quit.
Keep developing.
You had eyes on people and they never knew. Eyes are also on you. Break the circles and break through.
If you have kids or work w kids:
Be patient.
Teach w love.
Be a good example.
Know when to pressure and when to pull back.
Know when to involve yourself and when to let them “fall.” Skinned knees are ok.
You are shaping a young human, don’t “wash your hands,” of them when they “disobey.” Connect, explain why and what is important. You’re literally helping to shape a future
