Glasses, Silver Dollars, Kids Choir Concerts and Random Rants

I'm I don't remember the exact session that it came it to me, it was a few weeks ago... Or the client that I happened to be training when a scenario popped in my head, but I do know it was during a plank.

Someone can come in to sign up and I'll ask "what are your goals?  what are you trying to do?"

Most will say something around the arms, abdominal area, butt and legs.
A few may say something in regards to how they want to feel, "I want to feel stronger," or what they want to do "I want to run a marathon."
And from here the A, B, C's fall into line. Goal Z sends us along this particular training path/program and so on.
And inside that path, I tweak and find little nooks and crannys to improve variables within that path, within you.
Then deep inside of that is where I actually find the gem... where I show you some thing's, if you're paying attention.

I've had clients, even still have a few, where I point in a direction and they nod "ya, ya, ya," but they arent actually listening.

Sometimes its just not about that ripped arm  or 6 pack and looking in the mirror and being happy.
Sometimes its just about looking in the mirror and being happy.
Sometimes, this training, is just that... helping you change your perspective.

Funny things have happened in my sessions, over the course of sessions.  We've talked about college and job decisions, we've talked about engagements, wedding parties, affairs and leaving people, we've talked about depression and pain, abortions, sick babies, sick parents, self help, and goals.
No clue how we go down these rabbit holes, but over the course of my career in this... yes, I see they want their goal list, thats the easy stuff to deliver.
I want to deliver that and then add the whisper in their ear and be the voice of the motivational quotes they read on instagram and say, "go do what you really want to do... go be who you really want to be.,, get back to day dreaming... dont be afraid to leave the cubicle jungle, don't be afraid to change.  Don't be afraid."
What if you sat there and gave yourself 5 minutes to acknowledge that all of your fears and anxieties are completely made up?  That they actually dont exist?  That you're afraid to ________ and that fear isn't real.
The world is flexible.  Your life is flexible.  Your story is being written, by you.  It could end at 80, it could end at 70 or 55 or 46 or in 15 minutes.... what are you writing?
If the 20 year old version of yourself were next to you, what you say to him/her?  What advice would you give?  So whats the difference in saying it to yourself right now?
I'm sitting here, typing away, thinking if 20 year old Jason were right here, what would I say....
I'd say, "Never give up.  You're going to change... you're going to go through things... never give up.  Dont let pain take away your enthusiasm.  Smile at it.  Keep moving.  Keep working to improve yourself, your character.  Dont let deaf ears shut you up.  Keep going.  Dont let your dreams fade, you can make them a reality.  Just go for it.  It's real.   Dont become a slave to debt and bills.  Take chances.  Travel.  You could be gone any day, leave it all out there and die on E."

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Do kids concerts rock?
God no.
But I really, really enjoy seeing kids develop.  I would never play one of those songs, right?  But I love seeing a group of kids get up there and do something I would definitely not do.  11, 12 or 9 year olds, up on a stage, singing a solo as well as they can, whatever it may be, that's awesome.  That's so freaking brave to see kids do that and grow right there in front of us.  They're who they are at 6pm, they're solo is at 6:30pm, when we meet them again at 7pm, after their song, they're now a new person.  They have a bit more confidence, they have another experience inside them.... they just grew, they just experienced something new.
why adults lose this... mind boggling.

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People come in, I've heard them say things about "felling self-conscious."  Men, women, doesn't matter.  They choose spaces where they won't feel that feeling.  I get them going, warm them up to the environments, I see their comfort. 

 But too often, I still see that smile lingering.  That "I want to smile full, but I'm so conditioned to worry, anxiety, some panic, and fear, I don't really smile fully," type of smile.  I literally just saw one. 

And every time I do, this song pops on:

https://youtu.be/l1p_NHFd8jM

The goal is to be at a level where you truly do not give a F what anyone says or thinks of you, because you know who you are, what you do, how you think, all the above, w confidence.  Not saying we can't or don't change, we should be evolving. But be at a level where if they don't like you or you're worried about what someone may say, for whatever reason, that's their issue, not yours. 
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I was in a little flea market thing with a few pricey items a couple weeks ago and walked past a guy on his phone.  He said "Hey, I have to call you back, I'm staring at a solver dollar," and I smiled.
Do I give shit about silver dollars?  Nope.  But I thought it was pretty cool this random stranger got a high off it.  It was a big deal to him.
Last night, I stopped by my parents and my mom showed me 20 some pieces of crafts she made for their flea market trips.  It's my thing, it's hers, I enjoy that she has a thing to enjoy.
We all have our "thing."  Just because  my thing isnt your thing, its all good things.
Unless your thing is being a dick, then no.
Which brings us to.....
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Random Rants

Dont like my potty mouth, dont continue.

1) If you are at a kids concert, control your kids in the crowd.  They're not funny, they're not cute, its not their show or yours.  Everyone is hear to see kids perform on stage, not your goofy kid dancing in the aisle.  

2) Since we can now change birth certificates and change gender and all that, I definitely want to get involved.  For a really long time, I knew something was different and its time I come out of my closet and let everyone know.  I am an alien and want it changed on my birth cert.  Or, if this isnt acceptable, I choose to be a monkey.  I always wanted to be a monkey as a kid, so this is it.  I am now a monkey.  I love bananas, I love sitting around in grass and doing monkey things so, thats that.  Now that I'm writing it, I choose monkey over alien.  If I go full alien, things may get weird and they'll want to dissect me.  If I go full monkey, I'll have some nice options.  And I dont mean baboon or whichever one runs around with colored butts throwing poo.  I'll be a fuzzy guerilla, laying out catching sun, napping in trees, eating leaves, monkey-ing it up.  

3) Trump... where to begin?  I've asked a variety of people, "why are you voting for Trump?"  and you know what they say?  nothing.  They say nothing thats actually PRO-Trump, they say things that are anti-Hillary.  So I ask again "Why are you voting for Trump?"  and now they'll say something like "He's not a politician."  no?  Please explain.  And this turns into an anti-Barrack thing or an anti-democrat thing and i stop them.  See they cant actually say why they're voting for Trump.  But I do see a very common thread among the great majority of pro-Trump.  

Racism and sexism.  

Everything I've heard Trump say is rooted in fear, anger, stupidity, racism and sexism.  If that's your president, what does that say?  

Now, this isnt pro-Hillary.  This is how absolutely awful our situation is.  On one hand, we have  completely unqualified, ignorant, silver spoon, B television star.  On the other, a career white collar criminal.  

Dont be blind.  Dont bother talking shit one way or the other.  Our choices are terrible.  We actually have no candidates.  So dont embarrass yourself standing on your soap box, posting a bunch of anti-Hillary or Trump crap, both options suck.  The best thing we can do is no show on voting day.  A complete protest of zero votes and make them rethink the entire system.  Clearly its flawed.  We have how many people in the U.S. and these are the best available???  So dont vote.  "Well, if you dont vote, you dont have a voice and your opinion doesnt matter."  I used to say dumb shit like that.  Then I saw Florida cheat Gore out and the governors brother happened to be the beneficiary.... hhhhhmmm.  No, your votes barely count as is.  Then when whoever gets there, they're owned by congress and billionaires, your voice is 99.9999% irrelevant.  

 Back to the main point and note I had on my phone: Trump is racist, sexist and so is the great, great majority of his supporters.  

4) Apparently, I'm attracting people of supreme intelligence... And I have no issues sharing w you. 

I was just pitched a supplement company by "Miss Organic," who went on and on about how healthy she is, and everythings organic and her kids are organic and blah blah blah.

We say bye and she goes to her car... Where she lights up a cigarette. 

Are you f'n kidding me?!?!
You can be super nice, a real sweety, but if you smoke, close your mouth about your nutrition, supplements and "organic lifestyle."



5)  The next asshole that tells me they're friends with Stipe, I'm quizzing you.   
I mean... An asshole came up to me, thinking he was bragging "ya, my boy Stipe, we hang... Can't wait to watch him fight Werdum," and pronounced it WER-dum. It's pronounced like ver-doom you f'n idiot. So not only are you a poser for lying, you're a poser for not even knowing shit about the sport you claim "your boy," competes in. 

(Rant over)

My training; sharing light and conversations

(The header on the blog should probably change to "I'm basically weird as £¥@> with pretty weird @ss opinions, hang in there."  Shit happens when you study Hunter Thompson, Dennis Rodman and Jim Morrison at a young age.  That's basically my asterisk on most things I say and write.  Fortunately for football, those pretty blue and white helmets in State College, PA and the coach w rolled up khakis and coke bottle glasses... Things stayed within "balance," and by balance, I mean it can swing reeeeeaally far one way and reeeeeeaally far the other way. 

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"Hey moron! How about something about fitness!"

Gotcha

I rarely write about my own actual training.  Not entirely sure why, but mostly I feel like a dick.  "Hey i can lift a bunch of..." but maybe it's relevant.  And sometimes people wonder if I actually do workout... That might be saying something. 

Well yes, I do.  Historically, I've really tried to get into everything.  I definitely still believe balance is best and most healthy and you should run, lift, yoga, sprint, kettles, all that and then some.  But this year, especially recently, I truly don't care to do anything other than lift the heaviest damn weights in the gym.  

The biggest pain in my ass is loading the leg press.  A) it really sucks trying to track down 18-20+ 45lb plates and B) I hate loading them.  I've actually considered hiring a personal trainer for leg day just because I don't want to lose the plates, how's that for lazy. Second biggest pain in my ass is kicking up Dumbbells for shoulder press.  Anything over 75's just sucks.  I also thought about a trainer for this as well, just someone to hand me the 100's would be super useful. 

(I'm kinda writing this funny, but I actually have these thoughts in the gym.)

Back and rows, I pick a weight and add 20lbs every round until I'm using the entire stack. Super meat head and I don't care. Repping 200 for 15 reps on the lat pull feels pretty sweet.

Chest work, because I'm an idiot and attempted to "power lift," I hurt my rotator cuff because the form is ridiculous. I knew better, but my fat kid ego said "435lb bench isn't that hard," and now I have pain at a certain depth. Dummy. For the record, it wasn't very long for me to get over 400.... But that's probably also why I'm hurt. Flip side, I don't really care much because I suck at caring and training myself. So for chest, I fatigue my chest w tons of chest flies before touching a bar.  Probably 6-10 sets of fly variety to really torch it.  The goal is to make 225lbs feel like 500, then I don't have to sit there for 45 minutes repping til my hands fall asleep. 

Legs... As I said, screw the leg press.  Squats and deadlifts... Welp, back to me being a dumbass. About 75% I tweaked something in my knee, possible mcl. Nothing constant, or too intense, but enough to scare me into not being a complete idiot. The last thing I want is a surgery so if this means I'm turning into a pro power walker, so be it. 

Cardio... See knee notes above.  I do try to hit the prowler 1-2 per week just to crush the lungs and heart rate... Love that thing. 270lbs loaded up, a decent 60 foot (maybe?) sprint and your lungs are on fire.  6-10 of those and you'll be looking for a trash can or a dial a friend for cpr.

Another downside to my meat headed-ness?  Almost no t-shirts fit, only one dress shirt fits, and I've split 2 pairs of khakis in the ass and one pair of jeans right up the thigh, Incredible Hulk style.  I sat down, heard it and went NOT AGAIN, and looked at my crotch... But no rip.  I assumed my ass, found a mirror... No rip. I heard it!  Where is it? Literally right up the front of the thighs... Jeans.  Idiot. 

What have I learned?  I learned that I'm finally enjoying just lifting and not worrying about x result.  Maybe I've gotten biggie than I'd liked and my goal of 225 has taken a back seat (gained 15 actually), I don't care.  I really enjoy lifting the biggest Dumbbells available.  

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I had a conversation recently.... And as it was going, I wanted to say "do you mind if I write about this?" But i don't want people thinking anything they say to me could end up here.... Truuuuuuuust me, I hear some crazy shit 😉... No seriously.. Crazy shit. Especially with election talking heating up.  Craaaaazzy shit. 

Anyway, this was a former client/athlete/etc., and they were slipping, confused, lacking motivation, just treading water. We text. I asked about goals, they were scattered.  They are floating out there but no plan, just there.

I asked what they do w time.  No real productive answer... Again, just there.  

It got to the point where my questions and persistence was riding them hard.  I could feel it, they started responding different, shutting down a bit, almost like my asking about goals was a personal attack.  Which was fine w me.  If asking about our goals feels like an attack, that says something about how you feel about your goals, not me asking.  Think about it. 

So I lightened up and shared my perspective. This was a few weeks so I'm paraphrasing as best as I can remember, but I said something along the lines of - 

I get nothing from you. You don't pay me, there's no physical reward i receive from seeing you become successful and make it, right?  We may never cross paths and have contact again. So understand, the only thing I get, my reward in life, is knowing I did something to spark a little light inside you. That's it.  I may never actually see it shine. I may never know if you did anything with it. But I need to know I tried to spark it. I need to leave this conversation knowing I tried to help you see the spark. You know you're talented, you have vision, you have drive, you have the potential... You just need the light to see the path. - 

I've talked about yoga, meditation, fitness, reading, float tanks, fringe therapies, outlier therapies and concepts, a bunch of wild things, right? (Buy me a few beers and I really start talking).  

A problem we all can suffer from to some extent is "life."  This life.  We get caught  up in the momentum of "this is my life now," and lose that voice that whispers the entrepreneurial idea we used to day dream about and scribble drawings of on napkins in coffee shops.  We go "I have bills and debt now, so" blah blah blahdy blah and throw water on the fire, the light.  It's like the camp fire man.... It's still smoking... There's still some hot coals in there.  If there's a light, if there's still some heat, if there's still a pulse.... Light it up. 

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It's so weird for me... I'm xx years old, still not 100% sure what type of resume skills i have, but there's one thing i can really, really do well. Talk you into doing that thing you've been wanting to do that you've been putting off.  And I mean what I said. There's no money here for me, I don't stick around long enough to be in the equation, if it was even a thought. I truly just want to enjoy being a part of kindling, the match.  The fire is yours.